Nursing home resident

After NRH, I was officially a nursing home resident 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️. The only time I was looking forward to was Friday, as I’d always go home for the weekend 😌👨‍👩‍👧🏠.

One thing that I absolutely hated there was the food 🥴🤢. I’ll describe it in just three simple words: bland👎🏼, overcooked👎🏼, and repetitive👎🏼. I’m a huge foodie, but I like good food. Good variety, good quality, organic, seasonal, with many different herbs and spices😋🤤 (garlic is a must🧄😉). I think vegetables should always be just blanched, to still have a crunch and a taste, with most vitamins preserved inside. I wouldn’t say that’s too much to ask…? I’m not picky when it comes to the range of food products, but I just like healthy food that isn’t boring. That would be the simplest way to put it. I eat everything really I just choose not to eat certain foods, or choose one over the other, for example brown rice instead of white, because I’m health conscious💁🏻‍♀️. That reminds me of a quote saying that you should treat your body as if it was a temple 🧘🏻‍♀️👇🏼

🦋 Your body is a Temple, not a drive through 🦋

The vegetables served were just a mush🥴🤦🏻‍♀️ you could see it especially with broccoli 🥦, on the plate it was barely still green in colour, you didn’t even need to chew it, absolutely zero taste🤢👎🏼, and I’d say if you were to pick it up off the plate it’d probably just fall into a million pieces 🙉. Just like that. Actually you wouldn’t even be able to pick it up, because it’d fall back onto the plate straight away, before you were able to lift the fork🙉😂🤦🏻‍♀️. Seriously. Like it has fallen off my fork multiple times 😂🙄, no grip, a spoon would be a better choice here!
Initially I’d just accept it and stay quiet, not wanting to cause any trouble, nor to hurt anyone (which I know now was a huge mistake). I disrespected my needs and wants, because I didn’t want to seem problematic, or perhaps hurt someone. Then I started ordering brown rice instead of white (small steps), before I started voicing my thoughts at resident’s meetings. Probably because I’ve reached a certain limit of frustration by then…😩🤷🏻‍♀️ when I was getting white rice again and again, despite my requests. Anyway to cut a long story short, I was repeating myself at the meetings with unfortunately no changes, and a continued disappointment. When I’d go home every Friday I’d enjoy the food and drinks. Homemade bread 🍞 made from scratch (by dad❤️), chocolate avocado 🍫🥑 mousse (made by mum❤️). Most of you are probably thinking chocolate + avocado?😲 How does that taste? Well..honestly? It’s the most amazing combination (cocoa powder + avocados + coconut milk + maple syrup + dark chocolate chips) 😋🤤👌🏼. Prawns 🍤 with a glass of wine 🍷 was my favourite treat 🥰👌🏼 and still is. People closest to me know how I adore prawns 🙉🥰😂. Eating what I was in the mood for, and a huge variety was what I lived for, compared to Orwell’s menu=same choices every single week, I actually knew it off by heart🙄. Never to mention the chips, the mixed grills, the lack of anything raw 🤦🏻‍♀️ Disaster! In a brain injury unit? Where people are in an active rehabilitation to get better…wow🤨! So yeah going home was like breaking free from prison!

but it wasn’t just the food I was looking forward to, if you’re wondering 😂🙉😅 I’m not that bad! Friends coming over, evening games & quizzes with my parents, having some drinks, just being comfortable in my own environment, surrounded by loved ones!😌👨‍👩‍👧

Being a quadriplegic (all four limbs affected by stroke) patient in a hospital you lose all the dignity 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️, it basically goes out the window 🪟. So exactly that happened for me back in October 2015. Being a nursing home resident is no different… and they didn’t make it any easier on me, constantly moving staff around (just as I got used to them) and employing new carers. That huge turnover was very frustrating, I had no choice but to get used to it. That lack of independence was probably the worst thing for me, especially that I used to be very independent before the injury, and I hate asking for help 🤦🏻‍♀️ always hated it! If I could do some things by myself and not depend on carers then living there wouldn’t be as bad. Unfortunately for me, it was a very unpleasant experience…
One of the things I was really lucky about was that the girls taking care of me were mostly young (similar age to me, or younger). We used to chat about everything that you’d chat about with your friends at that age, so clothes, make up, tv series like Love Island 🏝😅🙉😂 (I know…! Trash tv, but addictive, and something to gossip about), Netflix series, and boys of course! 🤫🤭😜. So the atmosphere wasn’t clinical, thank god! 😇🙏, or I’d go mad🤯. After my showers they’d blow dry my hair, sometimes paint my nails 💅🏻, or do my makeup 💄 for going home, or even organising an odd SPA day with a face mask etc. And not the face mask that we’re all familiar with nowadays 🙄😷😂 I mean an actual beauty treatment 🥰. Thank you girls for taking care of me! 💕🌹 Later they employed a new activity girl, so she’d always come into my room for a chat, also do my hair/makeup/nails, organise games (poker tournament would be my favourite), but most of all she was Spanish 🇪🇸💃, and since I’m learning Spanish, and absolutely love the language 🥰 (and everything else about Spain) it was a great opportunity to practice a little 🗣. Gracias señora P💛🌻 (you know who you are!)

🦋 Never say “that wouldn’t happen to me”. Life has a funny way of proving us wrong 🦋

I tried keeping busy throughout the days, watching videos, Netflix, reading books 📚 etc., but sometimes I would pause ⏸, look around me 👀, and think 💭… “is this really my life now?” “How is this possible?” Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine myself in such a diar situation 😩… dependent on others, wheelchair bound, and a nursing home resident? 😧, but then I’d just snap back thinking-“this is temporary!” “This isn’t how my story ends!” “I didn’t come this far, to just come this far.” 👊🏼💪🏼👣

🦋 Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us 🦋

I’ve said multiple times, that probably the only thing that kept me there for so long was the Physiotherapy. I was happy to have it every day, but most importantly with my physiotherapist (who I’ve worked with from the beginning), and who knew well of the goals I was working towards. He was very positive and patient, believed in me and my potential so that felt great! 😌 It’s so important to have that bond and understanding with your therapist, to be successful in your recovery! 🤗

One day in August 2019, after experiencing a specific situation I decided to make an official complaint. I had to wait for the complaint manager, or someone from management to come and see me first. So i kept bringing it up with the floor staff regularly, however nothing was happening 🙄. Days were passing by, then weeks, then months… Finally I brought this up with my psychologist at Orwell, she could see my frustration building up, and became involved. She was an advocate, acting on my behalf, since I couldn’t just walk up to their offices (which I’d most certainly do if I was able to walk😞🙄). She was reminding the complaint manager and management about me weekly, always getting the same reply: “someone will come speak to Klaudia soon”. I had psychology sessions every week and every time she entered my room she’d ask me: “any update?”, my response would be : “no” 😫, each time! It’s nearly year 2021, I have left Orwell now, and do you think anyone ever approached or contacted me about this? Nothing annoys me more than being ignored. Especially being a wheelchair user, I see this a lot! Others treat you as if you’re less able, or perhaps deserve less? 😒😠! To be completely honest I already forgot about the situation I wanted to complain about, and made my piece with it, but how I was treated, or should I say mistreated is the thing I’m now concerned about…(it’s all about Respect, which I think EVERYBODY deserves? Correct me if I’m wrong!)

🦋 “When you hear the word ‘disabled,’ people immediately think about people who can’t walk or talk or do everything that people take for granted. Now, I take nothing for granted. But I find the real disability is people who can’t find joy in life and are bitter…” 🦋

I think this is where I’ll stop writing about my journey with the nursing home. Been there done that ✅. I’m happy that I can officially say I’ve “escaped” 🏃🏻‍♀️…🙌🏼🤗

🦋 I trust the next chapter, because I know the author. 🦋

On the subject of Next Chapter… 📖 Last week, while driving home in the car from lokomat therapy me and my dad were listening to the radio 📻. When this song came on, I listened to the lyrics throughly, and honestly I got goosebumps all over my body…👇🏼Really got me thinking 💭…

When I got back home that evening, I felt very intrigued, feeling the need to research the song and what it was about. I had to watch this, because this is the video that was going viral years ago, when I moved here. From then on his career was going up and up, until it hit the roof 👇🏼

After hearing both and putting it all together, it really hit me hard! While searching YouTube I stumbled upon his documentary called “The Next Chapter”-really recommend it. He’s yet another survivor, giving hope🍀, proving that you can hit rock bottom, and still pull yourself back up… I liked his voice as a teenager, but was never really mad about him. I remember all the young girls screaming and pulling their hairs out at his concerts🤯😅. Sleeping outside shops to get tickets to his concerts🙉😂 absolute madness-The Bieber Fever🤯😅.
Today I feel like his lyrics are coming from the heart, seem authentic…they really have a meaning, and an important message. Many will relate to him, even me in a way… Now after battling his depression & drug addiction, and having a successful recovery he can really enjoy his career. It’ll hit another level, because he went through something tough in life, and has a story to tell. One with the happy ending! That we all love👌🏼😍 I’ve listened to this song multiple times that evening, no kidding! 🤷🏻‍♀️🙉 maybe I got The Bieber fever 🤒? 😅😂🤣

🦋 Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes 🦋

Mentioning Justin Bieber and his story, made me think that I have to attach this quote I love (here) from Jim Carey 👇🏼 It’s just a perfect example of this 👌🏼👇🏼